My mom's aunt.... Her name is Iwilla (Aunt Willie for short). She is the one lady in my family that I admit I am most like. Who is she, what is she like? First I share she has always been a pack-rat (is that what we are called) and there isn't a day that goes by where I am reminded of that inherited quality I possess. She is one heck of a determined, strong, no nonsense, stubborn woman (stubborn being another inherited quality for me). When she said NO, it was NO! She has my respect as she supported her sick husband through some difficult years, carried their family and raised her son to be an amazing much respected teacher. She worked hard all her life. She was one sassy looking lady, her slim features, full head of dark curly hair and cherry blossom lips that stand out in every picture we have of her. She is an avid reader with probably at least 150 books in her home at any given time. She loves sunflowers and my children, especially Sandy. She never forgot when someone did a good deed for her and she never forgot to say "I love you" to me when we talked, and when she said it, you knew she meant it!

My Aunt Willie took sick this summer, being diagnosed with cancer. She has battled through treatment - determined to see past the cold winter days as she longed for the sunshine of the new summer to come. The past few days have seen for a weaker time and she is now waiting in peace for the next phase of her journey through life. It won't be long before she gets to personally meet Jesus with His extended hand and smiling face. He will soon embrace my wonderful aunt as He escorts her through the golden paths of heaven. She soon will be joined with my mom and they will laugh and dance all afternoon in celebration of coming home. I pray that peace is with her as she rests this evening and that when the time comes, that she soars through heaven just as she knew she would. My heart is heavy and sad that I soon will loose my special aunt and her son will loose his awesome mom.

I now once again find myself reflecting on life and what it really is - what matters and what doesn't. I take 2005 on with gusto, all hopes and anticipation of a year of change and challenge. I wait quietly for news of my aunt's new journey.

Cheri

Well everyone is getting geared up for New Year's Eve. I could never understand what the big hipe is over this particular day. I mean, I know it's a significant day of the year - however is it significant enough for people to spend hundreds of dollars a person to be entertained and fed? I hear of people spending $200 a person to go out for an evening that on any other night would cost less than $50.00 ! If only we got geared up like that for every single day of the year!

I was driving along the other day and my thoughts drifted to a vision of myself. This vision was kind of blurry and all of a sudden I saw myself walking around one of those mirrors you see in an amusement fun park, the ones that make you look short and fat or long and skinny, even wavy all over, depending on where you are standing. I realized that the past year I have actually been the product of a mirror that was somehow showing my reflection in those ways. One day I was just as I appear and the next I was somehow distorted into the vision of a person I didn't recognize. Who was that lady with the short fat legs - didn't she once have long skinny legs?

I started to think of people and their personalities as we facilitate roles of mother, father, office manager, plant manager, courier drivers, husbands, wives, girlfriends. All of us brushing through the daily requirements of our employment jobs and the roles we carry at home. Do we ever spend time playing "our" role, the person we "really"are. The person who laughs and jokes, the one who's eyes sparkle with the excited anticipation of something that's going to happen. The man or woman who can throw everything to the wind to spontaneously just run and jump for joy. Do we often allow ourselves to let our complete guard down, banish our concerns and worries and just really enjoy life. Throw caution to the wind? Do we often let ourselves run through the rain storm with our hair flying and flapping everywhere without care?

Turning an amazing milestone in my life, I am feeling a mid-life crisis coming on. I have always wanted auburn hair, I have always dreamed of Italy and the beach house that has a small desk and computer reserved for me - the one I see myself through the open window that is open for the sea breeze to flow through spitting salt water at me. Long beaded hippie skirts look so comfortable as do capris pants and long walks along sandy beaches. I long to do something wild and crazy like call into work and take 2 weeks off, jump a plane for Europe without telling anyone until I am thousands of feet into the air (do airplanes fly that high?), carrying nothing but a nap sack. I dare myself continually to just quit work and travel for three months. To visit missionary camps, to meet a handsome Italian man, to write that book, to sit with women in foreign under priviledged countries and listen to their hearts. There is so much I long to do that my conservative reserved cautious ways protect me from doing. I wonder recently, what happened to that carefree girl I once was - when did she grow up and grab that spontaneous nature and wrap big gold bows on it and stuff it in the oversided bag that she hid under the comforters in the closet?

I often tell so many younger women to enjoy life, have fun and remember that the years fly by and before you know it - you are entering the final years of life and you wonder how did it go so fast. I wonder if on my head stone it will say "she threw caution to the wind" or "Italy will never be the same" or will it say "she wrapped herself in her cocoon staying soft and protected"..... hmmm... will my spontaneous nature return to shake up the journey of my mid-life crisis to make 2005 a year to remember......

Anyway, New Year's Eve - it's most certainly over-rated!

MOI

Crying and how it gets the job done! Right! I was almost finished a blog to share with you the other day when Joseph frantically called me from his bathroom shouting "mom - help, there is water all over the floor". I went to the bathroom and getting on my knees I indeed verified the water situation, as I sat right in it. I was beginning to feel slightly panicked but tried to remain composed all while talking myself into not thinking the worse. Well, it didn't last long as I discovered it was the toilet that was leaking, however I couldn't figure out from where. Finally I found a crack in the toilet tank and I sat back in frustration and cried, really cried.

Joseph looked at me with worry and I simply asked him to leave me alone for a while. What did I do? I flushed the toilet, honestly thinking about putting my head inside, and then shut the water off to the toilet. Good thinking aye?! So you ask in wonder why in the heck would I have cried over something like that? Well, It was not the entire toilet situation that made me cry. It was the fact that the "boy's" bathroom was messy despite my numerous pleas to them to clean it, my cottage deal is quickly going sour and may not close (goodbye car), the front door lock is acting up, my back patio door is frozen up strangely from the inside, the car I am driving is acting up, the dog ate a cake I was bringing to a friend' s house for dinner and the list goes on and on this week. Oh, and I wonder if I might be a single, lonely woman as I shuffle along with my cane into old age. Isn't that enough?

Well.. joy comes quick. We don't need this toilet immediately - there is another one in the house, and I think there has to be a way to fix this relatively inexpensively. If the cottage does not sell, so what - I just get to sit by the lake one more summer. And big deal if the car breaks down - there are buses and FRIENDS. And heck if I do shuffle off into old age as a single chick - think of all the laundry and cooking I will miss doing.

But you know what, crying certainly relieves pressure and frustration !

I can't believe it's been almost two weeks since I wrote - soon my followers will be long gone with dust kicking behind their heels. I had hit a point in my life that I was so busy that my home was a drop in centre. I'd drop in to pick up something to head somewhere, only to come home to drop into bed to jump back out and repeat the same routine. I had recently stopped and wondered how that routine happened. So, I have deliberately put a temporary cease to all my activities that have pulled me away from home. I am in a nesting stage. Resting, regrouping and really enjoying just being home. I will now have time to turn this computer on and let the thoughts process.

I think most of us hit a stage in life where we wonder where the past years have went, we realize it was a blur of activity. Are you really doing what you want to do with your life, or are you in a rut. I mean a rut that you can personally do something about. Three months ago, due to a literal crash in a wall, I turned my life around. I did things that under normal circumstances would have scared me - like quit a 14 year job - one I believed I'd retire from. I quit it without even job hunting. I left the job on August 19th with not even a slight insight into a new job. The first morning of my unemployment, I was woke to a call from someone who knew me and was put in a difficult situation, needing me to help him for a few days. Then I had a job interview three days later - to which the same day I landed the job - packed with more salary, and benefits that I didn't have with my previous employer of 14 years.

I was blessed and protected during this time period. I have grown through the experience of just stepping out in faith. This year has been a year of major trials and tribulations, but somehow by the grace of God, I have landed with both my feet on the ground. Those feet might be somewhat bruised and sore, but I landed. This I realize, is just the beginning of many changes to come in 2005.

What about you..... what is is that YOU have wanted to change, but have either procrastinated on or have been frozen with fear about? And, what do you think you will do in 2005?

Night.........

I think I am dealing with exhaustion, yet I keep going. I feel like a dollar store version of a duracell battery. I just keep going, but the going just gets slower. I miss writing and think about it all the time, when I am driving to work, eating my lunch or staring out the window at work. I am going to get back on routine once I get the cottage work, moving and sale done. I am also going to get my home office finished - it's been in a mess since last February. (hmmm.. that's almost a year!)

Well... my charger just ran out of energy, I am going to plug it in over night and anticipate that when I wake up I shall be re-energized. I have a full schedule now until Sunday. I guess I should be thankful for such a full social life. If I was sitting home all the time, I would figure I wasn't well liked.

Night.........
from wheepy and sleepy...

Yesterday I received a pleasant surprise, yes more surprises!! My brother in B.C. was talking to me via Ma Bell and he said, "I hear you had a big birthday weekend, surprises and a big birthday bash." I was taken back that he knew about it as I had not talked or written to him. I asked how he knew about it and he said "I read about it your blog spot." Yippeee... my brother reads my off the wall writing. I was quite impressed that he took the time. So, I guess just more inspiration to keep sharing, afterall a relative is checking it out. Now if I could just get them to take a ride on the comments section!

I had a nice birthday dinner yet once again Thursday evening - shared with my cousin, her man and my son. Deb's birthday and mine are two weeks apart, and a few years - she being the younger party. I received really neat news - her and Dave finally got engaged...yes, they are eventually going to jump off the diving board and tie the knot. YIPPEEEEEEEE!! Congratulations.

Oh, I have posted way over 100 posts on this site, however the counter has stopped counting?! Weird. My next project is to figure out how to get pictures on this site. I have another little blog I was thinking about running, but didn't have much success with it (check it out at: singlefriends.blogspot.com) but I managed to get pictures posted on that site. I am going to try to set it up for this one now! Shall see how the weekend holds out time wise for me!

Night...Cheri

I, being a deep thinker (often so deep I get lost), have been wondering if there is anyone else out there other than me that wants to slam on the brakes of life. You know, just stop everything that is going on in this world, our cities and neighbourhoods. Stop the wars, violence and destruction. The state of our world is critical and extremely sad. Young children proudly carrying rifles, young children being killed in the cross fire of adult domestic issues, widespread diseases, unsafe cities and homes, hatred and wars all around us. Joseph continually comments that he thinks I should be watching more t.v. and paying attention to the politics in our world - and I tried, but maybe I am like a duck in the water, I just want to float down the lake being warmed by the sunshine as I stick my head in the water to hide from the issues of our world. As much joy that I know is there, I have a very awareness of the darkness all around us - that appears to me many people don't really comprehend. I can't help but wonder if those people that drive beside me in the morning rush hour ever think like I do?

Anyway, I am thankful for my faith and the peace I receive through all the trials of this world. With my personality and thinking mechanism as it is, I would be ravaged with fear.

Night......

Well...the birthday has come and finally almost gone with respect to the celebration. What an event. Yes, I turned a magic age and the weird thing is I don't really feel any different, other than exhausted. My birthday started two weeks ago when the girls decided we'd have a practice run at the celebration and all go dancing. On Saturday I was invited to a late lunch with two of my long time friends Mary & Laurie (one I have been friends for 35 years and the other 37 - can you imagine?) Anyway, I was kidnapped on Saturday afternoon to a destination of Niagara Falls. It was an interesting chain of events, including taking the wrong road and ending up in Woodstock (don't ask!). We had a good evening together and returned home early on Sunday. I had been asked to brunch by my children so had to rush to get ready. What I didn't know was they had arranged a surprise birthday party with some of my close friends...counting in at 52 of them. Then on my actual birthday my daughter sent me a beautiful flower arrangement, and brought a most delicious cream and strawberry cake for dessert on the night of my birthday. My friend at work gave me a very special card - it was special because she has taken the time to know who I am and bought a special card that reflected that. It wasn't just a randomly picked card. I was so overwhelmed with excitement it has taken me days to get recover. It was a beautiful celebration with my incredibly loyal friends. I am overwhelmed by the realization of the many many friends I have been blessed with. They have humbled me with their love.

If I have accomplished anything in this life I am passing through, it is that I have four beautiful, unique and loving children that put up with me as well as the great joy of each one of you, my beautiful friends. I thank you my children and friends for being there for me.

By the way, I am the owner of a cool t-shirt that says "ALL ORIGINAL PARTS! I note, it may be true, but not by choice! lol...

LOVE YA, Cheri

Well...as all know, I have been struggling somewhat lately with finding something "interesting" to say. Anyway, my "young" faithful friend Danielle... has helped me with the next blog and I paste it right here - as words from her own mouth.

Danielle begins:

Cheri,

I tried to comment on your last blog with this lengthly piece. When I tried to send it, it said that it was too long to send, so this is in response to your - not having anything to write about. Maybe you can copy it and paste it on your next entry and then comment on it. I dont know. Write back, Love Danielle


Sent: Thursday, November 25, 2004 1:45 PM

Talk about "How quickly our lives can change from one minute to the next so to make the most of it"........I heard a really sad story a couple of days ago about a not so close friend but a friend and a dear old soul. She was a volunteer at my kids school, she helped out with pizza days and with my lunch program, The Lunch Lady. She is a grandmother and would volunteer on behalf of her grandson which she basically raised herself. The sun rose on him and set on him, the apple of her eye. He is in grade 2. I haven't seen this lady at all this school year. She hasn't come to any of the lunches as of yet and a few of us had brought that up in conversation. Oh well, maybe she had bigger and better things to do. She is a retired lady. Anyways, I got a phone call from my friend and she asked me if I remembered Lois from lunch days. Of course I did. That kind of woman left an impression on you. Especially the situation she was in with the grandson and all, you dont meet too many people like her. She was the kind of lady that when she spoke to you she touched you in some way, meaning that she would have her arm around you, or hold your arm and look right in your face. The phone call was to inform me that she had a bad fall and that she broke her jaw and that she was in the hospital. Sounds horrible, doesnt it??? Well, that wasn't the worst of it. She has been in a coma since then caused by, I believe, swelling or bleeding of the brain........and she has only a couple of days to live. I can't believe such horrible things happen to such wonderful people and all in a split second. What she fell on or how she fell remains unknown between my friend who passed on the news and I. All we know is that when she passes, heaven will be a better place when she arrives but the dear old soul will be missed by many. Today I pray that her little 7 year old grandson, Robert, has the strength to make it through this very difficult time that he has before him and that he will always remember his grandmother for the amazing person that she was. This is a little tribute to my dear friend, Lois. And to remind us to live life to the fullest because we never, never know when our time is up. Try to tell everyone that you care for how you feel about them as much as often - here today, gone tomorrow. Sad but true.There you go Cheri.....a little inspiration. I await for your next blog. I have a feeling it will be really awesome.Love ya!!

Danielle...I thank you for sharing your heart, maybe it's your turn to start a blogspot!! What more can I say, as I reach for my kleenex and cry for these people...especially the little boy Robert. Remember always that THERE IS A HEAVEN and it's a beautiful place. It's just sad that we leave behind our loved ones who bear the pain of losss.....Maybe if you are an incredible prayer warrior, or maybe you have never prayed, but maybe today you could try....for Robert.

Have a good evening all.... Love, Cheri

Nothing about nothing...Today I had a long day. I am now in my p.j.'s and anxiously looking forward to pulling back my bed covers and sticking my toes deep into the pretty yellow sheets that await me. However, out of a concern of appearing to be old and tired, I am waiting until 10:00. Lately there has been nothing more relaxing for me than crawling into bed and snuggling up to my abundance of pillows and fluffy blankets. I have to tear myself out of bed in the morning, and not because I am tired or depressed, but simply because it feels so good to just lie there.

I have been sneezing continually all week - no appearance of a cold, I don't think I have allergies, yet I continue the sneezing pattern. It's starting to become irritating, my nose is all red and irritated from the not so soft kleenex on my desk.

I have decided I desperately need to exercise. I have visions of me in my cute little gym clothes running around the track and then landing on the tred mill...I have picked out the cute little exercise clothes, I have just not managed to get to the store to buy them. Nor have I even remotely stepped out of the car to visit the gym to even find out how much it would cost to have a cheap membership. So is all I have managed to do is decide that I have to do something about it.

This weekend is my birthday and we will continue to celebrate, heck I need to continue celebrating, after all before I know it, I won't even know it's my birthday!

I know my kids want to buy me presents and they are not sure what to buy so I decided to share with them right here, gift certificates at Future Shop or Best Buy (or even Staples), gift certificates for the Christian Book store, long socks, ink for my computer printer, plastic surgery for the wrinkles around my eyes, pedicure, MASSAGE, cleaning lady for a few months - oh a trip to Texas, Mexico or Portugal.

So...writing has been boring for me lately. The brain is stagnant and I have decided I need to go to Tim's site and steal one of his articles - just to have my friends squeal in astonishment at the level of my intelligence, then my conscience got the better of me and I decided that if I was even going to consider such a tactic, I might better check out a blog spot somewhere and steal their writing...then at least the chances of getting caught are much less....

Oh well....maybe something exciting will come to me this week that I can share....Night.....

Well...the sad news today. I finally share that the cottage that I so enjoy is sold. I have been going through the past two weeks really not thinking about it much. But reality is the sanctuary I have placed myself through out the summers is now going to be the host of a new family. The Hagen /Stinson/Boot/Dobson/Homsy generations have seen their days to incredible fun, laughter, and love. We now stop to breathe, think and rest. I force myself to look to the new journey and avenues of adventure the future will hold for us. I see Italy, Portugal, Peterborough, New York City and B.C. in the vision I cast. I see a change in the history to be made in the future generations of our family. They will no longer be cottage sanctuary seekers - maybe they will be world travelers or sky divers. We do know that they will not be city slickers and hopefully not baseball freaks (sorry Blair!)

Anyway, here's to new roads to be traveled and old worn roads to be treasured. I shall promise to walk the dusty paths of these new adventures in the midst of admitted fallen tears and fear.... but the path we WILL walk......

MOI

Pictures. I am intrigued by the camera. A Cannon, Pentex or a Nikon camera, the heavy ones with interchangeable lenses is a piece of art in my personal opinion. I have a digital camera that manages to take some pretty awesome pictures. However, the sound of the firm click of a lens shutting as it has captured the perfect picture is a sign of a job completed successfully. It does not compare to the dull swish of a digital camera in action. Have you ever held a professional 35 millimeter camera in your hand and snapped away? I see myself in a bit of a jungle snapping pictures of the swinging moneys and running tigers and my vision carries me to my journey along a dusty path to the historic homes in the sunny spots in Portugal. The sun is shining down on my wide brimmed straw hat as I walk in awe through the villages with my cameras hanging off my shoulder and one in hand as I crouch down to snap pictures of the little children playing soccer in bare feet through the streets of their villages.

The trip of adventure is not complete without a good 35 millimeter camera in hand. I am not sure if tonight I am dreaming about me in the quaint villages I want to visit in Portugal or the desire to be an amazing photographer......

It's time to dig into some real heart stuff...stay tuned....
Night......

Birthdays. Some people think that birthday's are the best day of the year. I used to think that until 2004 when realization seeped in that this would be the year of no return. I would be entering the senior stages of life. I refused to acknowledge my coming birthday most of this year. However, the past couple of months has begun to show me that this month is a time of celebration. A celebration of ME. Yes, what awesome creature I am. So perfectly created. So, in honour of all the perfection and incredibleness, I have decided to celebrate. Tonight marks the beginning of a 12 day celebration of me, this incredible being. I celebrate before, on and after the special day. Yipppeeee....what an amazing year it is to celebrate! MOI........

I know, I know...where have I been! Here...just too overwhelmed with "nothing" to write. The past couple of days I have had a nagging feeling - and nagging of what...I don't know. I'll have to figure that one out. But, the most important thing I feel is that I have been reflecting on my new little 8 year old friend (now 9 years!). The little guy who shared with me that he can't run like the other boys. I have an answer...if those little boys want to run...great...think of all the things they are missing as they are running quickly to wherever they are going. When we run we miss smelling the flowers in the gardens, we miss the sun rays that shine down upon us and yes, we even miss the sun glistening off the ice on the side of the road on those icy cold days. I think this week I am going to walk, very slowly.....
Off to bed with me...headache and all!

Today I met an 8 year old boy who shared a bit of his story with me. He said to me "I have muscular dystrophy. I can't walk and run like the other boys. Sometimes they make fun of me." As I sat looking into the eyes of this georgeous child, I thought my heart would leap right out of my chest. I listened to him talk as we walked through a hallway with other children running ahead and past him. I asked him how he felt when the other children laughed at him and he replied "it makes me angry".

This little boy has touched my life in seconds of my day. I wanted to grab him and hold him very close to me and protect him from the harshness of the world that surrounds him. As I walked with him in the midst of other running children, I felt as though for just a few moments, I had a glimpse of his world. It felt so sad. On the other hand, I felt so good that he felt safe enough to share his heart with me. Afterall, I just met him today. His birthday is next week and somehow I have to find a way to touch his life to show him that someone out here thinks he's so special.

Any ideas my friends?

Whewwwww.... I can't believe it has been two weeks since I wrote. I do have excuses...I was off in Kentucky with the Ministry, work has been busy and my house was in desperate need of cleaning, and of course that doesn't even begin to share the magnitude of my crazy schedule, i.e. Bible study, church, socializing with the numerous friends I am blessed to have.

I looked at my stats today and note that I have written 110 entries on this site...I wonder how many of you, my dear friends, have read all 110 entries? Maybe you could share by posting a comment. I'd be very interested to know.

I was thinking as I sat here reflecting how much I think I would enjoy living in a little village on the outskirts of town. I picture myself in the front room in front of my computer, which sits directly in front of a huge picture window that overlooks grass, hills, trees and a running river.... my friends walk by with dogs or children in tow and wave as they walk the journey of a care-free almost stressless life style. Oh to imagine....

Imagine....the word sparkles in my world these days...imagine is like a sparkler lit and held up against the dark black skies of the night... how bright, beautiful and exciting !

Today is my friend’s 40th Wedding Anniversary.

Today she thinks celebrates it without her husband.
Sandy you are not celebrating it with him - on earth anyway, but
I guarantee that there is a party in heaven with Jesus, the angels and
the family that sits with him day by day watching over you.

He smiles down at you Sandy - he shakes his head often as he watches
you dance and live life to the fullest -
Oh how he shakes his head when you set foot on the

dance floor at Sonoma’s!

He’s proud of you that you are so strong and he thanks God
that you have a positive attitude and you smile through the tears.
He cries when you cry my friend.
He laughs when you laugh, and he hugs you

when all your friends hug you.

Today he celebrates that God gave him the most beautiful wife

he could have asked for.
He is thankful that you are there with his precious

children and grandchildren.
Never forget that he sends angels to laugh, dance and cry with you daily.

Today my friend, he raises his glass to you,

his most precious beautiful bride;
The wife he cherishes and loves and he says:

"I laughed with you, I cried with you, I argued with you,
I made love with you, I ate the dinners you cooked for me,
I shopped with you, and I LOVE YOU ....

"Happy Anniversary Baby - You’re one wild and crazy lady !! "

My son... A while back someone asked me when I was going to write about my eldest son Brian. I had not figured out why I hadn't written about him yet and realized that probably because he is my quietest non-assuming child. He is quiet in the house, keeps himself busy with working, his sports and play station games. He's not a huge talker - unless he's just finished a ball hockey game, the Leafs are in the playoffs or if someone important has been traded, or if I have forgotten to buy cereal and milk. Other than that, he is a listener and a watcher.

However, he was not always like that. He was my hyper-active child as a youngster. ADHD takes on a new meaning when this child was born! When he was just over a year old he was jumping so fiercely in his crib that he actually crashed the entire bottom out of the crib and landing on the floor, all while still jumping up and down barely missing a step. He was so busy that I couldn't even sit him on my lap for more than a few minutes at a time, and we would pass him from person to person. At eight months old he knew the word BALL and he was crazy over balls. I'd take him for a stroller ride to the local mall and just inside the doors of Zellers they always had this huge cage type apparatice that contained all kinds of bouncing balls. He'd see those balls and scream for them.

Brian loved being outside, he loved to play on the street with the other kids and when it was time to bring him in, he would scream "blue murder" (remember that saying). The entire neighbourhood would know who it was and why! Then there was the time that he thought peeing on the neighbour's flower gardens was a game. It took quite a bit of time to get him out of his newest fasination, watering the flowers.

Brian had the whitest hair I have ever seen on a baby. He had crystal
blue eyes that twinkled constantly. His smile was so sweet. He still has a sweet smile and manages to use his eye expressions to perfection. He has calmed down considerably and no longer crashes through things. He has a thoughtful and kind heart and makes friends very easily.

I am sure he wonders how he ever ended up in this noisey, crazy family and probably gravitates more to Sandy than any of us - she's almost as quiet as him. Sheira drives him bonkers, he tolerates Joseph and actually appears to enjoy the role of big brother. Me, well apparently he doesn't bother to argue with me as "it's pointless" apparently. He doesn't say he loves us - but I know he does.

These days is fasination is his little remote car. It has gagets and batteries, and a tool box that he carries everywhere - even to his brother-in-law's pre-wedding party in Collingwood where the golf course has taken on a whole new meaning.

I am blessed to watch him grow into this neat man who doesn't really want to give up being the big kid with the toys. I can't wait for a nice young woman to come along, sweep him away from his toys and make him into a good husband and father.

Brian, has challenged me, worried me, made me proud and he has made a difference in my life and the live of his brother's and sisters. He is a special person who has grown up overnight. He's the man of our house!

Thanksgiving... I sat this Sunday afternoon around the kitchen table watching my friends as we celebrated my most favorite celebration - Thanksgiving. I quietly began to think about the many things I am thankful for. First of all, that my friend Julie invited us to share this special dinner with her entire family. I am thankful for Charlene who became my friend over 35 years ago and that she shared her family with me and that they have opened their arms to us. YEA for Charlene, Danielle, Sandy, Julie and their husbands & children! I am thankful that my children are healthy, happy and an incredible blessing to me. I am thankful that my daughter's wedding was everything she dreamed it would be and that her husband made it a very special day for her. Not to mention that my daughters are beautiful and my sons are absolutely handsome. Oh...and of course my new son...Blair...he's pretty awesome too. I am thankful that Michelle and Chanel are still a part of our family and that these children love and care about eachother.

I was at church on Sunday getting ready to help out with some things, and I took some time to say hello to a few friends to whom I have not seen in the past three weeks. I chatted with a few, hugged my favorite little kids (whom I really missed seeing!) and waved at a few friends. As I was heading down the stairs to the front lobby, my quiet dear friend reached out to get my attention and took the time to hug me, say HI and ask how I was. This doesn't sound like anything special (maybe because he's not necessary the "sentimental" type), and I am not sure I could explain why it was so special, but it was. I am not sure he would even suspect how his efforts made my day, but I must say as much as a lot of really neat things happened that day - this was the most special. I bet you he doesn't even realize it was him !

I am thankful for my new friends - the ones that cook for me when it's been a long day, give me more support and love than I could possibly give them. And you my extra special friend - thank you for trusting & letting me be there for you in the tough times.

Today is the 5th anniversary of when my mother passed away. I am not sad about it, as I know that she is at peace and is where she always knew she'd be...Heaven. She spent years believing yet still wondering if there was a heaven and now she has her answers. However, I did carry somewhat of a heavy heart today thinking about how much I miss her. I am not sure I could explain it, but it's this shadow, an emptiness since I lost her. It's a lost diamond in the gold bracelet that's missing. Things just don't quite shine the same without her. I am so thankful that I was given such a beautiful mother. She was the kindest, gentlest and most special person I know. Her zest in life was quiet and yet a powerful one. Mom loved Christmas and we loved watching her at Christmas as she was just like a kid when it came to presents. She loved it so much that every year (even when professing being broke) she bought herself a Christmas present! Without fail, mom would ask each of us what we got her, what did it look like, what colour was it, and what would she use it for. This was always a fun time for me as when she would ask for hints, I would give her the most craziest of hints (never even close to what the present was) and she'd spend days trying to guess what I got her. When she finally opened the present she'd laugh and say, that's not what I thought it would be, "it's not even purple, and I can't eat it!"

I miss her, I love her, I cherish her memory and I cry often when I feel lonely but most of all, I am THANKFUL for her. It was HER that taught me by example to love people, be tolerant of people and always watch for the underdog. She was a quiet, most humble woman who showed perseverance and gratitude continually. I am sure I did not always make her proud, she was a tough act to follow, but I tried. I have incredible stories to share about this woman - some that would make you laugh and cry at the same time.

So, this Thanksgiving, I am truly THANKFUL for my mom and the many people who became my family when life was a little empty.

Night....

The Wedding... For those of you who have been waiting and asking, I share that the wedding was incredibly beautiful and perfect. My daughter was the most beautiful bride I have seen. She was a perfect at midnight as she was at 9:00 a.m. She glowed. The groom was handsome and cried...YES!! He gave his 17 1/2 minute speech and broke down (slightly) a few times. Weather was ordered to perfection.

The limo service on the other hand was the only not so perfect situation and I am sure they will rectify the most smoky incident...details to follow..

I shall share more later, but it's been a long two weeks and I "long" to head to bed.
Cheri